Soy Vey! Soy Formula Frought with Dangers

One more thing before we head out. Soy milk (including soy formula) consumed in large amounts sounds like it can have some pretty scary and unknown affects on babies and children.

http://www.greenlivingonline.com/HealthNutrition/dangers-of-soy/

Is there nothing left that is just plain safe to eat? For years we've been led to believe that soy is the ultimate health food, and now this...

I know a lot of people wean their babies off the breast and move towards soy milk. Based on what I've read, it seems like goat's milk or organic cow's milk would be a better bet.

Cross Country Tour

Tomorrow we are headed to the airport to embark on our grand cross country tour. We're going to see all 4 grandparents and travel through 4 time zones. I'm trying not to freak out about all the delayed and missed naps and night wakings. Focus on the positive: grandparents want to care or your kid all day while you go get pedicures or see your first movie in over a year with your husband!!

So, loyal reader, I'll be taking a little break from blogging over the next week. Will report back with traveling tips!

Happy holidays!

Voices From The Bitter Side

The checkout line at a supermarket always seems to turn up some kind of small talk, especially around the holiday season as it is now. At the Key Food store, I walked up to the checkout with a few small baking items. The little guy was in his stroller, bundled up in his snowsuit and adult-sized scarf.

The cashier - a woman in her mid-40s, I'd say - looked at me, said hi, then looked down at my year-old son. She made googley-eyes at him, and then, here it came.

"Oh, he's cute," she said. "That's the best age. It's downhill after that."

It occurred to me right there, that there is a reason mothers go gaga over babies of this age: THEY HATE THEIR OWN CHILDREN.

"My kid is 12 now, and all he does is talk back," she proceeded to inform me. That's nice, I thought, but having nothing else to say, I said, "so I have about 10 years?" To which she replied, "not even."

This is not a tirade against bitter mothers. But she was not the first to blurt out this pretty strong condemnation of her kid to a complete stranger.

The first time, Bad Mommy and I were standing in front of our local bodega. A woman walking with three children walked up to our baby - he was probably about six months old at the time - and began to ooh and aah, bending down to the stroller to get a closer look.

"He's so adorable," she said. "Enjoy him while they can. Cuz they turn into this - " at which point she turned and pointed at her teenage daughter. "They're angels at this age. Then they get an attitude," she informed me, who didn't particularly care.

Not exactly America's #1 Mom, this one. We just kind of ignored her and let her fawn for a minute, and then moved on.

But really: right in front of her daughter? This kind of comment is probably the exact reason the daughter is the way she is. Not to say I'm/we're going to be the perfect parents - we'll do the best we can. But I'd like to think that once the little guy starts to form opinions and starts to challenge me, this will be an exciting time. Perhaps I am naive; maybe I am stupid. But it was a harsh reality that these two women offered: after years of parenting, all these two had to show were strong, bitter remarks to strangers about their children.

I know this much: the day you catch me saying "and then they turn into this" as I point to my teenage son is the day that I need to have my Daddy License revoked.

Why Why Why?!

...when Junior spends the day w his nanny, does he sleep for 4 HOURS! straight?

Am I not good enough, not deserving enough of the luxury of a 4-hour nap?

Not only that, but word has it, just before he succumbed to this glorious state of uninterrupted shuteye, my son - the MANarexic - and I quote, "ate like a horse."

So many feelings I am feeling right now.

Since buddy's nanny IS teaching him Nepalise, and he LOVES her. maybe she should just raise him herself. He would probably just eat and sleep his way through a heavenly childhood.

(:)

Is That All There Is?

At the risk of sounding super depressing, Sunday was my BIG DAY OFF from junior and I WASTED it all away. Yes, these concepts deserve CAPITAL letters.

First (actually, the story is so lame, there is no "second"), first, second and last, the couch kidnapped me and FORCED me to rewatch for the 3rd time (the 3RD TIME!) a schlocky daytime movie that I've seen, well, 3 times!- and on a Sunday!

And it wasn't even true daytime television because it was the weekend. And that's just lame.

And it wasn't even on HBO!

Nor was it Lifetime channel, which I admit I LOVE because they are cheap Canadian-made productions starring washed-up Americans. And they are conceived, cast, shot, and edited in a matter of minutes in the dead of night in undisclosed locations so that no one discovers the shame that is the production and the forgotten celebrities featured in them.

My favorite so far is Road Rage: "2 housewives engage in deadly road rage that leaves one of them dead." OH-MY-GOD. It was incredible. I will not spoil the obvious end, BUT I will say the ENTIRE movie was just that - road rage. And a bunch of road rage acting. Grrr. I'm so mad while I'm driving. Amazing.

And it wasn't a bad channel, it wasn't a good channel, something innocuous and forgettable with lots of annoying commercials.

Normally, my excuse would be, I'm a "housewife", but on a weekend?

Even true housewives have enough of a life on their weekends to avoid mid-afternoon dramas (on tv, at least). There was just no excuse.

And I had HUGE plans - well, plans - that at least involved leaving the house.

But every time I made a move for the front door, visions of ME in a coffee shop, ME in a clothing store, ME on the street, ME anywhere, but on the couch looked - just - awful.

So there I lay, feet up, several pillows squeezed behind my lazy head with the beautiful day's sunlight blasting through the window, bouncing off the tv screen and smashing me in the face with its satisfied sunny self.

And as guilty and self hating and crappy as I felt, I had a REALLY GOOD TIME!

I laughed I cried. I was entertained. And I swear, next time I get this baby-free opportunity, it'll be different. Yes, it will. I will take that day and seize it!

Yeah, right.

Dare to dream.

Little Girls in Big, Mean Packs

Today I took the l'il fella over to Mamalu's. This was our second choice, as the car wouldn't start, so the Children's Museum was out. Incidentally, I was curious why it's called a museum, but a quick trip to their Web site told me that their permanent collection has over 30,000 "cultural" objects and natural history specimens. So, as most of us probably think of it as a playspace first - Totally Tots friggin' rocks - and a museum second, rest assured, it is a real, collecting museum. But I digress.

The l'il guy was interacting with most of the kids. He bounced balls around, stood around the four-legged playbox thing - what's it called? - banging the little plastic squares and all the twirling plastic things, and partied in the soft, purple and yellow spaceship-like object. This is when our troubles began.

About halfway through our visit, the spaceship was empty and l'il man decided to crawl on inside. Almost immediately, a little girl appeared - about four years old - and said he wasn't allowed in there. I asked why, and she said it was just for her, and her friend. I asked where her friend was, and she said, she's coming. And then I said, well, until she comes, my l'il man's going to be in here. And she said, no.

It's funny with little people because you can't really argue with them. I didn't say anything else, and my son played in the ship for a few minutes until her friend came. I took him out, but only because the two girls were climbing up the sides of the ship and jumping through the top hole. Which, I admit, looked hysterically fun. But they would've landed right on little man's head which would not have been cool.

After this, I became aware that the play area on this day was pretty much being run by a group of four or five little girls, I'd say from the ages of 4-6. They had built some type of mat/ball object in the corner of the space and no one was allowed inside. Then, later, they made some kind of house out of the spaceship and some oval cushions, with a door and and a roof. You had to knock to get in. My lil guy just kind of looked in from the outside, not really pressing the issue, but I could tell that he wanted to know why he couldn't get into the spaceship.

A mom joined the play area with her son and her kid wanted one of the star-shaped cushions that acted as the roof of the house. But the same girl who commandered the spaceship for her friend told this mom that she couldn't have the cushion. The mom said, we have to share, and the girl said, no. She then took the cushions and put them back on the roof. The mom looked at me, asked 'are these your kids?' and after I said no, she just shook her head.

After this, the girls roamed around with a Martian raygun. I can't tell you the number of times they pointed it at my guy and pulled the trigger, after which a whir of lights and noises came out of the barrel end of the gun. Really, it was kind of funny, but still, a gun.

There is strength in numbers, and there's even more strength in a number of girls. The mom said to me, aren't we lucky? and I said, why? and she said, because we have boys. I didn't really answer - boy or girl, I'm just happy to have a child - but then looking at how the girls were acting as a pack was sort of creepy. Not in an evil sort of way, though. But one could tell that their good time was enhanced by the fact that they were a pack.

I think we stayed as long as we could, but when one of the little girls, in her haste to jump back into the hole in the top of the spaceship, tripped right over my lil man, which made him wail, I knew it was time to pack him up and leave. Another Mamalu's adventure comes to an end...

Greenpoint: It's not just oil spills anymore!

File under: "GREAT!"

We already knew the nabe is home to an underground oil spill at least 3 times larger than Exxon Valdez. Then there are the giant glowing metal stomachs looming ominously over our horizon, reminding us of our proximity to a huge sewage treatment plant. Add to that reports of mystery goop oozing to the surface at various construction sites. And now this: chemicals from contaminated soil and groundwater that become airborne, entering buildings through pores and cracks.

What next? Radioactive scorpions that nibble at your eyeballs when you're sleeping? Well, at least they'd give the bedbugs a run for their money.

Remind me, why am I raising my kid in this part of Brooklyn?

Goat's Milk for Cheap(er)

Now that Junior's switched to goat's milk, I've been on the prowl for lower prices. At our local health food store, the 12oz can of Meyenberg powdered milk is about $12. I just found that Amazon.com (through the Vitamin Shoppe) has the same cans for $7. If you buy $49 worth of products from Vitamin Shoppe (why is it a shoppe? why not just a shop? or a store?), you get free shipping). I just bought 7 cans to qualify for the free shipping. Had I bought the same amount at The Garden on Manhattan Ave, I would have spent $28 more.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00014G43W

Melamine in Formula, Great!

I just finished reading the FDA website notices regarding their testing of formula and the melamine and related chemicals which have shown up in major brands.

Yay, another thing to be freaked out about. GREAT!

I've been feeding Junior Enfamil Lipil since he was born, in addition to nursing. I wish that I had nursed exclusively but things didn't get off to a good start for us.

Now that he is 11 months, I've started phasing out formula and replacing it with whole milk. He just finished his first bottle of all goat's milk and seems to like it a lot. I hope to be totally off formula soon.

I think while I'm turning his world upside down, I'm going to see if he can drink more milk out of cups instead of bottles.

Why I hate "Half Sours"

I just finished eating a classic New York-style half sour pickle and it made me furious and sad.

Actually, I ate it last Saturday as a side dish with my burger at DuMont but I still have a bad taste in my mouth. What is it with these New York half sours? It's like people in this city are so impatient they can't wait for a pickle to properly mature before they're plucking it from a jar and putting it on someone's unsuspecting plate. The result too often resembles a tasteless, vapid cucumber that no amount of salt can salvage.

Where I come from (Texas) we're not afraid to throw a bunch of cucumbers in a jar with some vinegar and pickling spice, put it on a shelf and forget about it for a year or two. The result is a cheek-puckering explosion of flavor that stands up to the pickle name. Whole sours should be bloated like an alcoholic's liver and soft to the touch. Slicing them should reveal a juiciness that's been gathering strength over the ensuing months as the chemical reactions transform the cucumber's watery insides.

During the long hot Texas summers as kids we'd go to the public swimming pool and order pickle juice snow cones. I don't imagine any New York City kids would find the brine in a bucket of deli half sours worthy of a snow cone topping. So why do the city's chefs consider these miserable excuses for a condiment a fitting accompaniment to their burgers and sandwiches?

Come on New York chefs, get with the program! Kosher sour dills are the way to go. If you don't have the time to pickle them yourself, pick up a jar of Vlasic. Heck, even a B&G Deluxe would do the trick.

Please remember this holiday season that we are in two wars and a global environmental and economic crisis. This should be a time of sacrifice, but not on flavor.

Why I hate "Black Friday"

I just finished reading this story in the paper and
it made me furious and sad:

http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2008/11/28/2008-11-28_worker_dies_at_long_island_walmart_after.html

Please remember this holiday season that we are in two wars and a
global environmental and economic crisis. This should be a time of
sacrifice and saving. None of us know if our jobs are safe. We all
have relatives with huge medical expenses and mounting debt. People
are losing their homes. I know that none of us are going to trample
people at a walmart, but the story made me think about the holidays
and some of the pressures they put on all of us...

Instead of rushing to buy things that maybe we can't really afford
anyway, how about making something? Are you a good cook? Maybe whip
up pickles or jams or bread or cookies? Crafty with the sewing
machine? How about making tote bags, everyone needs tote bags! You
can take them to the grocery store or to run errands. Plus they're
easy. Or put together a photo album. Everyone keeps all their
pictures on their computers these days so it's nice to have prints to
flip through.

If you to want give something homemade but aren't crafty etsy.com has
tons of great stuff.

I think what a lot of people need more than stuff is free time. Have
a friend or relative who has their hands full taking care of their
kids and home? Offer to babysit, or come over and cook lunch one
weekend. Or pitch in on a cleaning service (I guess this only works
if you know they want one! Ha! It could be sort of insulting to be
told someone's hiring a cleaning service when you think your place is
really clean already).

Good with your hands? Offer to fix the squeaky window or clogged
drain or other little things around the house. Make a little book
full of coupons ("good for one car washing" "redeem for dry cleaning
drop off and pickup"). Some people feel weird about having their
friends do things for them, but I find that if you just show up,
paintbrush in hand, no one's going to stop you!

For all you techy types out there, how about setting up a website or
blog for your parents or someone who's starting a business?

Plus I know some of you are great writers and artists and photographers!

If you're good at organizing stuff, offer to tackle a project. Maybe
someone needs to sort through their boxes of stuff in the garage to
get ready for a big yard sale. These are things that no one really
wants to tackle, but they can actually be fun. Bring a pizza, put on
some music and get to work. While you're at it, organize a big group
yard sale for maximum money making!

Entertainment can be expensive and hard to find time for. Give a
friend a board game with a card that says that you'll host game night
at your place once a month. Or a pack of gift cards to a movie
theater plus your babysitting services. Or tickets to a sporting
event. Or a membership to a museum. Something that they can use
again and again, but that they probably wouldn't buy for themselves.

Share your ideas with your friends and family and see if we can create
some new holiday traditions this year.

Martha Stewart has lots of cute craft and gift ideas on her site:
http://www.marthastewart.com/crafts

I am officially questioning the efficacy of "bedtime routines"

Every night, I methodically do things in the same exact order -- dinner, bath, pjs, a little playtime, rocking in dark bedroom, singing (badly!), last bottle -- leading up to bedtime. The books tell me that if I am consistent, Junior will know that A leads to B which leads to C which leads to sleeping. Well let's just say that falling asleep without a little bit (or a lot!) of a fight is not Junior's strong suit.

Today, I picked him up from the Manny, came home, let him chase the cat around for a while, skipped the bath, didn't rock or sing, and guess what? He fell asleep after about 5 seconds of whimpering.

Tomorrow I'm going to give him his bath at lunchtime, his dinner for breakfast and take him for our afternoon playdate at bedtime. We'll see how that goes.

When Naps Cramp Your Style

Seriously, if asked, all I want in life (sadly) is my sweet WIDE AWAKE babe to NAP, and as much as possible. 12 hours? - do it.

This is, of course, both barbaric, unrealistic AND the mark of a bad mommy. But, what are you gonna do?

THEN, ironically, there are those days when all you want is to get out there (where? who cares. nowhere in particular) and hit the pavement, stroller in tow and see the WOILD, some people, a tree, some trash.

Nothing special, just a little meet and greet - a little air, no matter how toxic in our sweet neck of the woods.

It is always on these particular days/moments when junior decides to go down for the BIG SLEEP in the MIDDLE OF THE DAY! Buddy, really!? I was just getting excited.

Mommy even washed her face and slapped on a little age inappropriate, dollar store lip gloss - MEOW. She's ready to rock it.

It being the 5-block radius that is our stomping grounds.

So, there we are, buddy, deep in mid-afternoon through to late afternoon never-ending slumber, while mommy lurks, chomping at the bit, eyes glued to the monitor (even though baby's only feet away in the next room), like a caged animal.

Ready to gnaw off her own paws to escape.

Just waiting.

Waiting for the first signs of awakening, so she can do what?

Wonder when buddy will be ready for his next nap.

That's what.

Winter's coming... How are we going to fill up all these cold days?

Summer with baby is so awesome. Throw them in a shirt and shorts and out the door you go, to the park, to walk around, whatever. But then winter comes, and you realize that you're going to have to get a lot more creative with how you fill those days. I know there are a lot of classes out there, but so far I haven't signed junior up for any this fall because a) they are expensive and b) I'm not sure he even knows where he is sometimes!

For example, we did the "swimming" class at the Y over the summer. Junior was still at home laying on his activity mat for all he knew. I also tried mommy and baby yoga ($20 at Go Yoga) and ended up nursing a fussy baby for an hour. I can nurse at home for free.

But now that he's getting older (10 months on that blessed election day!), I'm ready to concede that we should start ponying up for some much-needed activities. We're trying mommy and baby yoga again (from now on referred to by the new it acronym MABY) and I'll try music classes again around the new year.

I'll post classes here as I hear about them. Please email me with suggestions! Also be sure the check the calendar.

thanks!